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Space Cadet
Space Cadet is the third episode of season ten of Family Guy. Synopsis Chris goes to space camp. Plot TBA Characters Major Roles *Peter Griffin *Lois Griffin *Chris Griffin *Meg Griffin *Stewie Griffin *Brian Griffin *Space Camp Guy *Space Camp Kid #1 *Space Camp Kid #2 *Space Camp Kid #3 Minor Roles *Mrs. Donovan *Neil Goldman *Nathaniel Hawthorne *Sophia Hawthorne *Johnny *Louie *Jinx the Robot *Brian Williams *Tom Tucker *Consuela De La Morrela (Cameo) *Bob Belcher (Pictured) Quotes :Principal Shepherd: Mr. and Mrs. Griffin, I called you in today, because your son, Chris has been getting in quite a but of trouble, lately. In fact, just yesterday, he tried to pass this drawing off as his advanced art project. :Shepherd shows Peter and Lois a picture of [[Bob Belcher] from Bob's Burgers] :Lois: Oh my! :Peter: I'm very embarrassed. :Principal Shepherd: Well, someone should be. ---- :Chris: Stop making fun of me! :Lois: Chris! Oh my God. No, we weren't talking about you. :Peter: Yeah, we were talking about Meg. We call her Chris, so she doesn't know. :Meg: offscreen Fuck you! :Peter: Shut up, Chris! ---- :Peter: Uhp, look out everyone. Double digit IQ joining the table. ---- :Chris: I don't wanna talk to you guys! You called me an idiot! :Lois: Oh, Chris, you must have just misheard us. :Chris: I was standing right there. How is that possible!? :Peter: Cuz you're an idiot. That's how. ---- :Chris: I'm going to school! :Stewie: It's Saturday, right? ---- :Chris: Thanks mom and dad! You guys are the best parents ever! :Peter: Would you excuse me a moment? :breaks into the home of some parents and steals their "#1 Dad" and "#1 Mom" mugs from them :Peter: These are mine now! :Mom: Hey! :Dad: Oh, honey. When we accepted those mugs, we knew this could happen. ---- :Chris: Mom, I can handle space camp. I'm not stupid. :Peter: Well, regardless, on the way back, we're stopping at that down syndrome camp we passed. :Lois: Peter, that was The University of Florida. ---- :Brian: What's that? I thought all the space shuttles were decommissioned. :Astronomer: Well, we always keep one space craft flight ready, in the event a satellite needs service, there's a space station emergency, or an Italian guy needs to over exaggerate. :to two Italian guys arguing :Louie: I swear to God, Johnny. I've had it up to ... :gets into a rocket ship and flies to space :Louie: ... here with your BS. :Johnny: Ooh, he's really had it this time. to space I'm sorry Louie! :Louie: space Alright then! ---- :calls Lois and begs her to take him back from space camp :Chris: You and dad were right. I'm not smart enough to be here. Can you come get me? Please mom? :Lois: Okay, honey. Of course we will. :gets another call :Lois: Hang on, I got another call. :calls Lois, crying :Lois: Hello? :Peter: Lois, I'm at the gym. I hate it here. Everybody's calling me fat! I wanna come home! :Lois: Well, I suppose I- :gets another call :Lois: Hang on, honey. I'm getting another call. :calls Lois :Lois: He-Hello? :Stewie: Hey, is fatass home yet? Put him on, I wanna talk to him. :gets another call :Lois: Look, I don't know who this is, but I'm getting yet another call. :calls Lois, crying :Meg: Mom, kids at school are bullying me. They're telling me to kill myself! :Lois: Look, Meg. I'm busy right now. Just ignore them and call back, later. ---- :Peter: I've always wanted to be an astronaut like Lance Armstrong. :Chris: It's Neil Armstrong. :Peter: He lied about his name too!? :Stewie: Well, on the bright side Chris, even if you're flunking out in school, you're by no means, the dumbest person in the family. ---- :gets locked into a space shuttle that goes to space :Peter: If this is what it takes to get out of Florida, fine. ---- :Brian: You know what? You only live once. I am sticking my head out the window. :sticks his head out of the rocket ship :Brian: Yes! This is the best version of whatever's so enjoyable about this! ---- :Stewie: I'll tell you what I won't miss. That waiter who thinks he has to be funny. :to Stewie at a restaurant, with a waiter taking his order :Stewie: Yes, I'd like the chopped salad please and can I get no onions on that? :Waiter: Hmm, I've got a few connections in the back. I'll see what I can do. :Stewie: Yeah, that's funny. If there's one onion on that salad, you can forget that $1.80 tip you need to live. ---- :Stewie: Hey, Brian. Check it out. Meg's poking around the cargo hold. I'm gunna give her a little scare. :presses the button on the cargo hold, opening the ship, and sending Meg flying out into the vacuum of space ---- :Brian: If we don't get this shuttle out of orbit soon, we're gunna run out of oxygen and die. :Peter: Is failure an option? :Lois: No! It's not! :Peter: Ah, that was my suggestion. ---- :Meg: Come on! We're running out of time! :Lois: Oh, Meg. All your suicide threats over the years, and you're just as chicken shit as the rest of us. ---- :Meg: Oh my God, we're gunna die! There's so many things I didn't do! I never got to go to college! :Brian: My book wasn't all I wanted it to be in spots! :Lois: Peter, I wanted to grow old with you! :Peter: Well, you kinda did. ---- :comes out of the space shuttle, stretched out :Peter: Well, thanks to no gravity in space, my spine stretched and I am now a confident 6-3. So, Lois, I will be leaving you and ending our marriage, to start anew with a hotter woman. Thank you for many years of suffering, and I wish you the worst of luck in the future, while I live life with someone younger, prettier, and less annoying. :gradually gets shorter as he said this, until he returns back to his normal state :Peter: Never mind, Lois. I love you so much. Songs *Hooked on a Feeling Trivia *Peter invented the razor blade comb. *Chris has an IQ of two digits. Cultural References *Chris gets an F, when he draws a picture of Bob Belcher from "Bob's Burgers" for his art class. *Peter is brainwashed into liking "Breaking Bad" and "The Wire". *Peter thought Neil Armstrong's name was Lance Armstrong. When he learns the truth, he is shocked to hear that Neil "lied about his name, too." in reference to the fake moon landing conspiracies. Deleted Scenes *Principal Shepherd suggesting Chris goes to cat school. *Chris saying he wanted to hear his parents have sex. *Stewie telling Lois that she must have gotten a new vibrator. *Peter goes to Europe and doesn't like it. *Chris watches Canadian Horror Story. *Peter complains about a Hamilton blender repeatedly getting re-gifted to him. *Peter becoming a pedophile boy scout. *Stewie tells the Space Camp guy to be careful with Chris. *A Chinese guy secretly working among a business full of Japanese people. *Chris gets a Russel Brand haircut. *The Space Camp Guy tells Chris to fix his marriage. *Peter brings home a cougar chick. *Peter giving negative reinforcement to Stewie. *Peter mistakes a fecal collection bag for a lunch sack of space food. *Peter's great grandfather inventing the first marital aid. *Peter rooting against Chris, and wanting him to die. Category:Episodes Category:Season 10 Category:Chris Episodes